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Fellowship Fortune

When my world first fell apart last year, everyone’s way of offering comfort was to say, “These things happen for a reason.”  I cannot express with enough emphasis just how much I hate that statement.  There was one person, however, who never made this statement.  Instead, this very wise and respected woman said to me: 

I don’t believe things happen for a reason.  I believe that unfortunate things happen to us at a particular time I our lives and they lead us into new situations and experiences that we could have never predicted.  And that is a good thing.”  

At the time, I so badly wanted to believe her, because she was the only person who did not offer sympathy or excuses that dismissed the sorrow that I was feeling.  Despite how badly I wantd to believe her, I never thought that would be the case.  Rather, I was convinced that I would struggle to find understanding and meaning in the new life I was forced to face.

It has almost been a year now since I listened to these words.  I won’t lie: this past year has been more challenging than I expected.  Only in the past few months have I begun to feel like my life has found the right and proper direction.  Most of the events that have taken place since we moved have been the result of the natural course of starting a life over in a new place.  Recently, though, something happened that instantly reminded me of those beautiful words of wisdom…

For a few years before matching to residency, I was sure that I wanted to subspecialize in Obstetrics and Gynaecology.  The problem with that plan was that the program where I went to medical school did not offer the fellowship that I wanted.  After residency, I would have had to relocate to another city for 2 years to get this training – and with a husband in his own professional career and two school-aged kids, this just seemed unlikely to ever be feasible.  The program I am at now also does not offer this fellowship, so when I matched here and my husband quickly fell in love with his job, I figured that maybe it wasn’t meant to be when it came to this fellowship traing.  Finally, when I fell out of favour with my mentor and role-model, who has training in this same fellowship, I began to wonder if maybe this whole time I was motivated by the wrong reasons.  Over the past few months, I have been pushing the idea of fellowship training, specifically in that sub specialty, into the background.  

However, the week after returning to work, I attended our monthly residency training committee meeting.  There was nothing specifically on the agenda about fellowship training, so I was surprised and caught off guard when one of our subspecialists nonchalantly commented on her department’s plan to start a fewllowship program in 2017.  My ears perked up and my heart jumped into my throat!  Plans for a fellowship program… In the subspecialty I always thought I wanted to do… Right here in my program… And it will be in place for a few years by the time I graduate.

I couldn’t contain my excitement!  Instantly, I realized that my interest in the area has everything to do with me and my genuine desire to study that area of obstetrics – everything else was just an excuse… Maybe a justification of why I felt like it wasn’t meant to be for me.   I talked with the specialist who is organizing the fellowship and listed to her tell me all the details and what they are working out: “We want to do this right from the start. We are working closely with the Royal College to make sure it will be fully accredited.  Our program already offers just as much, if not more, services and volume than some of the other programs that have a fellowship… We are all very excited.”

Yes, we are all very excited!  I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face for hours.  I went home and told husband about it, and he was excited too.  Finally, after a year of pushing through and enduring all these challenges, I saw that this wise woman was right…

…Unfortunate things happen to us at a particular time I our lives and they lead us into new situations and experiences that we could have never predicted…

8 thoughts on “Fellowship Fortune

  1. That is exciting. It is never easy learning these lessons when things that are out of our control happen and so true, that often they lead us into new situations that we would not have expected. I enjoyed reading this well-written post. Thanks!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. So this morning I thought how I hadn’t read any of your blog posts recently and was going to comment on your last post to check if you’re okay. Only to get to your blog and see that you have been posting all along and the posts just haven’t appeared on my reader… so that’s mildly disconcerting.
    This is a really cool post though, and even though it was way earlier this month, it made me SO HAPPY to read! I know you started having some panic attacks but I hope that this has remained a bright spot in your life 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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