All Posts

Day 22: We All Have A Story

“We are all special cases.”
~Albert Camus

We all have a story that makes us who we are.  I would argue that these stories are not always fun to tell or easy to accept.  It is these stories, however, that make us “special.”  My story is far from great, but I know it could have been worse.  I am the grown up child of a messy divorce, and this simple fact has made the “special case” that I am today:

My parents were newly divorced and were too busy hating each other and making each other miserable to really realize what they were doing to their children.  They provided the necessities and we never wanted for anything physical – we were clothed and fed, we went to school and we did well.  Emotionally, they gave us nothing.  I never felt special or like I mattered to my parents.  My accomplishments always seemed to fall on deaf ears and land in front of blind eyes.  I was a 12 year old girl with nothing to motivate me and no one to encourage me.
~The Truth About Me – The Cranky Giraffe

Some days I go back to being that 12 year old girl, and I get angry at myself every time I do it.  I am embarrassed that this so heavily defines who I am and how I interact with people.  I fear that I will never be able to escape from that 12 year old me.  And, that right there is the problem: I should not want to escape from her.  Rather, I should want to open up my arms to her and give her that which she never had.  I should be the one to support her, motivate her, cheer her along, giver her advice, and be her best friend.  That is exactly what she has spent the last 20 years trying to find.  Now I can be that for her, I just need to believe it.

We all have stories that make us special cases but many of us are too afraid to go back and read those stories.  Those stories are what make up who we are and we need to understand them to really understand ourselves.  Going back to the beginning can also tell us how far we’ve come and, hopefully, allow us to realize how much we can help ourselves.

I an not a special case because I am the grown up child of divorced parents.  I am a special case because of what I have become as a result:
I am sensitive, kind, and loving.
I work hard, seek perfection, and achieve my goals.
I put others before myself and passionately give everything I can.
I am a loving mom, a sincere wife, and a good friend.

I am all of those things, even if I don’t always believe it… even if other people don’t always believe it.

Hi, I am Cranky Giraffe, and I am a Special Case!

13 thoughts on “Day 22: We All Have A Story

  1. I need to recite this over and over. My parents (and my husband’s parents) divorced around the same age and yeah, it had a huge impact. Watching our parents date when we were starting to like the opposite sex. Feeling secondary to new boyfriends/girlfriends/spouses. I know I felt very alone during that part of my adolescence, and the scars still exist today at age 37.

    Like

    1. I never thought of it that way… In terms of how we make and view relationships. It is scary to think of all the ways we might screw up our own children!

      Like

  2. Great inspirational post. My parents did not divorce until I was 19. Instead, they tried the “stay together for the kids and be miserable” deal. That didn’t work, as my brother and I received the same amount of emotional care that you received. I understand your difficult journey, and I commend you for bettering yourself through all of it. Have a great day.

    Like

    1. Thank-you! I only hope that I actually have been bettering myself. Sometimes I feel like that is the last thing I’m doing. I’m sorry you had similar difficulties in your childhood too 😦

      Liked by 1 person

  3. “Rather, I should want to open up my arms to her and give her that which she never had. I should be the one to support her, motivate her, cheer her along, giver her advice, and be her best friend.”

    I’m so glad that you wrote this. It’s so important.

    Like

Tell me what you think, I'd like to know...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s