In a few hours, my Mother will arrive for her weekend visit to celebrate my graduation. In anticipation of this glorious time, Husband and I have spent the morning reminiscing about all the ways she will make this weekend a memorable one for us. Her comments and actions are so predictable that I decided I would make a game of it all: So, “Mother Visit Bingo” was devised:
If I was a mean person, I would consider printing this out and handing it to everyone who has the honour of celebrating the weekend festivities with us (including my sister and her fiance – who will add a whole other dimension to the complexities of the weekend… good thing they are staying in a hotel) and offer a prize to the person who witnesses the most “stuff.” Sadly, I am much too nice of a person and I would feel absolutely horrible if she discovered this. As her “Unspoken expectation of immense gratitude” would suggest, she wholeheartedly believes that she is a wonderful mother who is forever loving and giving and wants nothing but the best for her two daughters (who, by the way, never treat her the way she deserves to be treated). Who am I to burst that bubble of hers?
I have forever been, and will always be, the most disappointing daughter to my mother. The weekend of my graduation from medical school will be no exception to that rule (oh, except in the presence of other people, where she is always the most supportive and proud and loving parent anyone will ever see). For the most part, I have accepted that she will never change, but that doesn’t mean that it’s not hard for me to bear the brunt of her narcissistic behaviours each and every time I interact with her. I want this weekend to be exciting and special and memorable for what it is – a celebration of my achievements of the past four years. Maybe the best way for me to do that is to hide behind humour and sarcasm… Maybe not the most mature defence mechanism, but I guess it’s better than nothing!
Maybe, for the purposes of blogging, I will keep a secret tally and come back on Monday to show you all the completed Bingo card. Maybe it won’t be as bad as I think it will. I guess we can always hope for the best…