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Who’s Been Reading?

I love that people read my blog.  And, I love my dedicated readers.

Every once in a while I get a little spooked about who might be reading my blog.  Like yesterday, for example, someone visited my blog and read a whole lot of posts… In one hour I had 45 hits.  That is awesome and it gets me excited because it makes me feel like I have something interesting to say.  However, it also makes me a little nervous because I suddenly fear that someone I know in real life has “found me out.”

There are only 3 people in my “real-life” to whom I’ve given my blog address.  These 3 people, I know, wouldn’t really publicize my blog to other people.  However, I don’t really keep it a secret that I blog, and I do blog about my real life, so it wouldn’t take that much effort for someone to find my blog and link it to me if they put enough effort into it.  For the most part, I don’t think I’d care too much about people I know reading my blog.  There are some very personal things I write about on here, specifically about the psychological challenges I encounter, and I would have to just accept the fact that people I know in real life know those things about me.  I put it out there in the public domain, so I guess I shouldn’t care, right?

The biggest problem, as I see it, is that I also blog about people.  Real people.  Obviously, I don’t expose the people I write about; but if those people were to be the ones who stumble across my blog, they would know it was them.  And to be quite honest, there are some people (well, one in particular) whom I would be worried about reading my blog.

EEK.

Sometimes I’m tempted to find that one particular tag that links all the common posts, and just delete them.  Unfortunately (or maybe not), those posts make up a significant part of this site.  What does that say about me?   Regardless, when I think about removing them, I realize that I shouldn’t.  But that doesn’t stop me from thinking about it a week or a month later.

In the meantime, I keep a fairly close eye on my trends: google searches that lead to my blog, patterns in the posts viewed in one day, etc. and there has been nothing yet to suggest that someone I know might have been searching out my blog.  And to be quite honest, I think that if the person I was most worried about finding my blog really wanted to read it, she’d just ask me about it.

But I’ll cross that bridge when (if) it ever comes.  Perhaps instead of fearing it, I should start thinking about how I would deal with the situation if it arises.  What would I say, how would I explain myself, and in the end, would it all really matter?  I guess I have to think about how I’d feel if I stumbled across someone writing so much about me (and their feelings towards me) in a setting such as this.

How would you feel?

8 thoughts on “Who’s Been Reading?

  1. I stumbled across someone writing so much about me, twice actually. The first time there was so much information, my name might as well have been used. I won’t go into what, but there was enough that I received a few emails after it went up. I freaked and it came down.
    The second time, it was sweet. I knew it was me because I was there, but there wasn’t so much that anyone else would know who was the “her”. You write more like this second time. You write in the moment. You live your self out-loud here. I think it’s respectable.

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    1. Oh gosh, I hope you’re right! And, I hope that if it ever came to that, she’d think it was “sweet” too. You do correctly point out, though, that I write more about me in relation to her than I do about her in particular. I just worry that it’s creepy.

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      1. It’s not creepy. At least I don’t find it so. I see it as you working through your thoughts and emotions as you work towards achieving your goal and staying present in the moment.

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  2. I have some of the same worries you do. I think it is natural for us to be concerned, but don’t let it stop you from writing. I planned on removing two of my posts because someone I knew “found” me here, but I decided against it. I figured I would let them come to me and we could chat about them. The posts weren’t particularly harsh or anything, but they were about perspectives (mine, of course, being awesome and theirs being, well, not awesome). 😉

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  3. I kind of freaked out when I started reading your blog because it was just like the one I wrote last time! How strange! I think it’s refreshing to blog and share openly, but I just started thinking that I do need to be careful not to give away too many details. I don’t want to kill a relationship…but I’m at a point where I need to get it out.

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    1. Hmm. I’m intrigued about this blog you used to write, and the relationship that you are/were worries about ruining. I guess I’ll have to visit your blog!
      I’m also not certain what your comment says about my blog… Do I blog too openly, especially about one certain relationship?

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