… If they are, then I have certainly been going about this vacation all wrong! My lack of blogging over the past few days is completely due to the fact that I haven’t had the time, not because I have nothing to write about. In fact, I have had so many blog ideas run through my head that I could probably write a “choose your own adventure” type of blog post. Maybe I will…
On boxing day DH and I left the boys with my mom and we braved the malls… I needed to buy some new clothes for clinical, as well as some new shoes, winterboots, jeans, and I also decided to venture into the realm of “the tall boot.” I haven’t been on a shopping trip like that since my last trip to the outlet malls in Florida. Sadly, I spent way more money and came home with way less than I do when I go to Florida. I think I trip there should become high on my priority list (@combatbabe). We also took some time to go for lunch at Five Guys… somewhere I’ve never been before. OMG. SO. GOOD.
The next few days were filled with the obligatory visiting of family that comes with these trips back home. First we visited my Grandfather, who had a change of heart and decided that he could trust me enough to not give his new address or phone number to my dad. My Dad. He could be blog post #1 of my chose your own adventure blog. In fact, I could probably dedicate a whole category on my blog to my dad and his BS… and how his BS has screwed up my life… and how I finally told my dad “where to go” (maybe more respectfully) this summer… To quote a fellow blogger, my dad definitely qualifies as a “Dipshidiot.” Let me qualify that: a selfish, narcissistic Dipshidiot.
The following day we visited my Grandmother. This is the grandmother who was once married to the aforementioned grandfather. I didn’t want to visit her for numerous reasons: Her house has descended into a state of squalor and it also stinks like cigarette smoke. This is likely the fault of my dad and his coke-addicted brother, who use my grandmother for her money, treat her like shit, and then don’t help her. Right now my grandmother is alone and relies on home care to care for her and her house. My dad lives in Bali and my grandmother has a restraining order against my uncle. These two men have also burned every bridge in their lives, all for the sake of money, and my grandmother keeps defending them: this is why no one has anything to do with my grandmother. We didn’t visit her when we came home over the summer because my dad was here (giving me the opportunity to officially cut him out of my life) and the coke-head was sleeping on her couch. I didn’t want to visit her again now, but the “softie” in me felt bad for the lonely woman who is in remission from lung cancer, who has never seen her second great-grandson, and who might not make it to the next time we come back home. I worried that the guilt of that situation would eat me alive. So we visited her.
My grandmother has lived in the same house for as long as I can remember. Every step I took in her house was nostalgic. It was was nostalgic in a depressing kind of way. Maybe because every memory was of something that “was.” It represented something that “could have been” but is not. At the end of our trip, I had to venture out to the back of her house to dispose of a poopy diaper. I wish I had taken a picture of her backyard: It would have made a good instagram picture for a blog post about sad endings (#2 of choose your own adventure). I have so many memories of picking beans in her garden, plantint flowers, chasing my cousins, hanging clothes on the line… Now everything is cracked and overgrown and covered in snow. Half the yard is filled with my dad’s crap – like his real estate lawn signs (what a waste), and his overly expensive beamer that he refused to sell when he ran away from his life. How badly I wanted to key that car… But the good person in me would hav felt bad. Ugh.
Yesterday we went for lunch at my mother-in-law’s house. I didn’t want to go. The only reason I did go was because my sister-n-law was going to be there and she shares my dislike for the MIL. She begged me to come so we could occupy ourselves away from her and then talk about her after it was over. I’ve disliked my MIL for a while now, but a few days before Christmas, she decided to yell at DH and I because she didn’t like a decision we made, and then she insulted me and told me that it would have been better if I stayed home. I told DH that he could deal with her from now on. When she wanted to talk to me to “sort things out,” she started laying into me about how upset she is, so I cut her off, started telling her how I’m tired of her treating me the way she does, and then she hung up on me. She cancelled Christmas dinner, only for my sister-in-law to take over. In short, we went for dinner, I was the bigger person and said “Merry Christmas” to her and then politely refrained from interacting with her for the rest of the night. We gave her a beautiful photobook of the boys (that I made) and a Keurig machine (that I picked out) and she was “so taken aback” that we thought so much about her. She didn’t give me a gift. She tried to thank me afterwards and tell me that I was so kind. I just said “you’re welcome” and stared blankly at her. At her house yesterday, she didn’t even offer me a drink, she cooked a casserole with peppers (she knows I can’t eat peppers), and she told DH that she “better get A. when we are here in February… or else.” Here is blog topic #3 for choose your own adventure…
While all of this has been going on, poor little E. has caught some kind of viral respiratory infection so he has been grumpy, not sleeping, and hanging off the boob more than normal. I haven’t been getting very much sleep the past few nights and I’ll I’ve wanted to do is sleep. However, with all the excitement, I’ve had no choice but to get out of bed and participate in the Christmas Vacation Adventure. It hasn’t been all bad, however. We did have a wonderful Japanese Steakhouse dinner out with my sister and her boyfriend last night, and I’ve taken some time to crochet some very cute baby hats for my new niece!
Anyway, off to pack and clean my mother’s house so we can get on the road and return home (and to reality) bright and early tomorrow morning!