I am absolutely honoured to have been one of the original recipients of Prego and the Loon‘s Voicing Violence Award. It may not seem as such, since it has taken me so long to officially accept the award, but I wanted to make sure I gave the acceptance my full attention (and I also had so many other awards to accepts… in time order sequence). First of all, I want to thank Prego for designing this award and for also sharing her experiences with domestic abuse. Both of these actions, together, are hopefully making it easier for all of us women to heal from our horrors.
PREGO PROJECT RULES
1. Kindly thank the person who nominated you, and provide a link back to their blog.
2. Attach the Prego Project Award presented by Prego and the Loon to your site.
3. Provide a bit of hope and inspiration for those currently dealing with domestic violence.
4. Nominate some other bloggers whom you feel deserve this award!
As child I watched mt parents in their dysfunctional and abusive relationship until they finally got divorced when I was nine. Even then, it didn’t end. However, that was a long time ago and I believe it has made me a stronger person in more ways than I can imagine. My most impactful experience with domestic abuse happened in a relationship I had with a man, and it lasted 4 years. I won’t go into too many details because I believe that the only parts of this experience that matter are those that have made me become the person that I am today. Before I started blogging I had never told anyone about my abuse, except for my curent husband. And then I blogged about it. A daily prompt made me think of one of the worst instances of abuse that happened in that relationship. If you haven’t already read that entry, you can read it here. When I first posted that entry, I had only been blogging for a few weeks. I only had 5 or 6 followers and I figured very few people would ever see it. Nonetheless, it felt good to finally get it off my chest, even if only 5 people would see it. But three short days later that entry was freshly pressed and suddenly the whole world (or so it seemed to me) knew about my story. I was overwhelmed with the response that I got from that piece, but more importantly, I was humbled to learn of all the other women who admitted to their own experiences of abuse. I could not believe that so many other women out there face this violence. It is shocking and scary, but it is also comforting to know that I’m not alone. For the first time, I felt good about sharing my experience and I felt like by sharing what happened to me, I was helping to heal other women too.
Any type of violence or abuse is terrible and unforgiving, especially when it is done by someone in a position of dominance. Domestic abuse can be the worst abuse in so many ways, but primarily because the victim cannot easily escape the violence. It took me 4 years to finally get out of my abusive relationship and not because it was only abusive at the end or because the abuse just wasn’t “bad enough.” Domestic violence is part of a cycle and there are (many, many) reasons why the vulnerable person stays in the relationship. I am not saying that other, non-domestic abuse situations are better. They are just different. My advice to anyone who is or was in an abusive relationship: It’s okay if you didn’t end it right away. It has to be okay because it’s complicated. Always remember that you can only do so much and you need to do what is best for you. Eventually, when it is over and in the past, use your experience to grow, and change, and become a better person for it all. Don’t let your experience be something that happened to you; Let it be something that makes you the person you are (or want to be).
I am not sure who I should nominate for this award. There are a few people on my reader who talk about abuse in their past but I don’t know enough about their experiences to know if they fall into the category of “domestic violence.” Regardless, I will nominate them anyway and they can decide if it fits their situation. Primarily, I nominate these people because they have reminded me that I am not alone when it comes to living through, and recovering from abuse.
I was also going to nominate Combat Babe, but she was nominated by someone else and she graciously accepted it before I had a chance to accept mine!
- Prego Project… Voicing Violence Award (sallytudor.wordpress.com)
- Inspiring Blogger Award ~ fighting Domestic Violence (jayjaysfavorites.wordpress.com)